The other day during a group conversation with some friends (ahhh group chats, what a time to be alive) someone brought up the hot/crazy matrix. This is the matrix that states that the hotter a girl is the crazier she is.
OK, sure yeah crazy girls do exist, some examples include:
- Karla Homolka
- Amanada Bynes circa 2013
Last time I checked I wasn’t helping my husband murder young girls. I don’t have multiple personalities. My cheeks remain utterly un-pierced and I have never been arrested.
“Dude, she started acting all possessive and texted me non-stop,”
Welcome to the 21st century ladies and gents. Where, according to guys all girls are crazy.
As women, we spend our lives avoiding this label. We overthink every letter of a text – making sure to wait the appropriate amount of time before we hit send to avoid seeming clingy. We have mastered the art of pretending to not care while possibly caring too much. But the reality is we aren’t really overthinking the dinner dates you take us on, you’re just leading us to believe in a relationship that will never be.
Don’t call me crazy because I question what we are after months of seeing each other.
Don’t call me crazy because I’m upset that you made out with that girl in front of me at the bar when you took me out the night before.
Don’t call me crazy for getting attached or developing feelings.
Don’t call me crazy for wanting more than what you’re giving.
Don’t call me crazy for reading into the pillow talks and exclusive dates that you take me on.
Don’t call me crazy for thinking that you see me as more than just another girl because you ask me about my future plans.
I am not crazy.
We need to reevaluate how we define “overthinking“. I’m tired of blaming my anxieties about you on the simple fact that girls are known to over-evaluate a situation when you have given us every sign to over-evaluate it.
The last time I checked, a girl you just want to f*ck isn’t worth the good morning texts during the week. If you’re looking for a friend with benefits that’s cool. Tell us. You don’t want us to get attached? Be honest. Don’t string us along.
We are not crazy. You’re a D*CK.
So here’s a hot tip guys for how to avoid being a d*ck: don’t sweep us off of our feet only to let us crash when we fall. Be honest with us. If you sense attachment on our end, don’t string us along for the ride if you’re not feeling the same.
Don’t call us crazy, stop being D*CKS.
Feature image via @paigesambrook