Lifestyle

I pretended to be a beauty guru for a day 

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I have an unhealthy obsession with makeup reviews, tutorials and the YouTube makeup community in general.

It’s not like I’m any sort of pro or anything. In fact, I don’t even know how to apply liquid eyeliner (*GASPS* – I KNOW). But there’s one thing that I do love – a good lipstick.

Recently at a networking event, I acquired a liquid lipstick that retails for $4.99, from a brand that is completely cruelty-free and has a name you may recognize as the cheap drugstore brand your Mom would let you buy because it couldn’t possibly be real make up.

That’s right friends, Wet n’ Wild.

So, being the makeup vlogger idolizer that I am, I decided to put this lipstick to the test (purely for my own experimental enjoyment that now you get to read about if you choose to do so).

I put this Wet n’ Wild Liquid Catsuit lipstick through a series of tests. And by a series I mean two. I drank Starbucks and then I ate the messiest veggie burger you can ever imagine from Boon Burger Barrie.

Side note: If you’ve never had Boon Burger I highly recommend making the trip. There are two locations in Winnipeg and three in Ontario (Barrie, Guelph and Burlington).

I forced my friend Heather to take pictures of me eating a burger, made her hangout with me while lipstick was crusting off my face and shamelessly took unattractive photos of my mouth so that I could post it on the internet (you’re welcome).

So here you are friends, the masterpiece (disaster) that is my review:

I opted for an organey red. I’ve always wanted a colour like this and since it was free I decided to go for it! It reminds me of Spring and I’m impatient so it felt like a good idea. This is called “Flame of the game“. Whatever that means.

This is what it looked like right after application (10 am).

 

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Disclaimer: I have THE DRYEST skin in the entire world. Please don’t mind the flakes you see coming off my chin. Everything is okay, I do not have a disease, thank you for your concern.

I was also very proud of this application but, now that I’m looking at it I’m realizing I could use a lesson or two in how to prevent bleeding (actual beauty gurus hit me up plz).

It dried pretty matte but let me tell you, despite what you may see, it didn’t feel dry. It felt like a velvet cupcake was grazing my lips at all times. A feeling I’d be down to feel at all times.

Starbucks: I decided to use up some of my Starbucks gift card and grab a latte to see what happens when this lipstick met the lid of a Starbucks cup. I am pleased to report, it held up pretty well. So obviously I snapped a pic of my lips and the Starbucks cup lid too!

 

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I now realize this is not optimal beauty guru photo taking. But look! The lips! Look the same! The cup, on the other hand, could use a wipe but I mean, science (and by science I mean beauty experiments).

Later in the day, we went for a delicious veggie burger at Boon (mentioned above). So obviously I had to include pictures of me eating a burger. Here is me at Boon Burger looking like the hunchback of Notre dame and having no regard for class or elegance.

Honestly, how am I single? 

As I was mowing down on this delicious mess that is Boon Burger, I did realize a little transfer happening on my bun (haha) but all in all, it seemed to have stayed pretty still on my mouth face hole. Here is the aftermath of destroying this entire meal.

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As you can see, there is a little lipstick flaking happening here. Also, the typical middle inside part of the bottom lip is gone but ultimately, I think I’ve found a lipstick that can withstand my animalistic eating style. If you also eat like a baboon I highly recommend this lipstick.

Conclusion:
So what did I learn? I learned that trying out beauty products is fun. I also learned that Boon Burger is still delicious and they need to open up more franchises (Seriously, why isn’t there one in Toronto yet?).

I learned that being embarrassing for the internet is more fun with friends there to take your pictures and eat food with you. I also learned that when I wear my scarf like a shawl and eat at the same time I age about 20 years and develop a hump that I don’t want to see again until I’m 92 years old.

Verdict: This is a good lipstick, it’s $4.99 and completely cruelty-free. Buy this lipstick.

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BYE,

krystalsignature

feature image via @tumblr

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